Thoughts on Expectations

On Christmas Day I told my 8-year old son I would help him get his toys going if he had problems.  Over the course of the day I helped him with batteries, hard to remove screws and packaging - all the while managing a houseful of family and friends and cooking two meals.  I thought the day was great and that everyone had a great time.  I was proud of myself for paying attention to my son and not letting host duties distract me. At the end of the day, my son says to me, "You didn't help me with one of the toys".  My response was "What?  Are you crazy?  I stopped sooo many times to help you... " (you get the picture)  Turns out that the very first toy he asked me to help him with was still on the counter awaiting a battery.  After discussing how we should be thankful and focus on positive things, he realized he did have a great day and we both calmed down.

However, I had indeed failed to meet his expectation of "Dad will help me 100% of the time I ask".   He's an 8-year old hopped up on Christmas excitement and sugar after all, but I hope you get my point.  Maybe we can think about customer or even co-worker situations that were not all that different from this.

Let's say we have a meeting and I say "I'll call Joe and find out what he thinks."  You come to me in a month and say "Hey, did you ever call Joe?"  I say, "I did but he was busy with a support call, then I was, so we've been playing phone tag."  Did I break my word? Maybe I just didn't fully follow up or since Joe was busy put the blame on Joe.  The problem is that I didn't set a good expectation.  In my head I meant "If I have time, I'll call Joe."  You heard "Preston is going to call Joe and get this critical information for me.  I appreciate that because Preston can talk to Joe on a more technical level than I can."  Our expectations clearly were not aligned and our trust was broken over a simple thing.

What can we do better?

Expectations and commitments are a two way street.  If you're expecting something from someone, make it clear what you are expecting.  If you have a commitment to deliver, make sure you're delivering the right thing.

Here are some tips that I try to use to help me set correct expectations:

1. Be specific - "I'll find out what Joe thinks and get back to you by Wednesday"
2. Say it back - "Ok, so by Wednesday you'll find out what Joe thinks and send me an e-mail."
3. Ask a question if someone says they'll do something - "Are you going to get a spreadsheet from Joe?"
4. Communicate open and honestly - If you are having a problem "Joe won't respond", bring it up on Monday.  "Joe has been tied up in some critical support issues and probably won't get back to me until next week."
5. Keep track - Keep track of your commitments. Don't let the commitment date come and go with no action. 

Here's some interesting reading on Setting Expectations:
http://blog.clientheartbeat.com/customer-expectations/
http://worxsolution.com/what-four-year-olds-taught-me-about-success-of-a-team

Have Fun!

P